All is Quiet on New Year's Day

I hate New Year's Day. I've hated it ever since I can remember. While New Year's Eve revealers celebrate the coming of a new year, the morning after just sort of feels like, "Okay, now what?"

I woke up this morning and didn't know what to do.

This is a new blog for me - I've stayed away from personal blogging for a while now - the practice just sort of fizzled out. But it's a new year, and of course I too have goals.

I've decided to dedicate 2018 to self-care. It's a hippy-dippy term for guilt-free indulgence. But it's not an indulgence, it's essential.

Happy people believe that all you need to do to be happy is think positively. But people with medically diagnosed mental illnesses know better. Forcing a positive mindset sounds easy on paper - but much harder in practice.

How do we flip the switch on negative thoughts? For me, medication is my #1 resource. But lately I've been battling demons and it's exhausting.

So to return to my goals - or resolutions. Self-care is something you do for yourself that nourishes your mind, body and soul (I guess, if you believe in that). I'm not a spiritual person, but I am unhappy - so if there's substance to this whole self-care movement, I'm willing to try it.

When I chat with my doctor during my annual check-in with him he asks about the medicine, but he also asks about what he calls my coping skills. These are the things you do in junction with the meds to live a better life.

2017 was a rough year and I felt my coping skills slipping away. I felt corned by my life and felt that I had no options, so I just stayed in a constant fight or flight mode. That's no way to live your life.

So,  my New Year's Resolution is to introduce more self-care into my daily life.

Today, I started small. I took a nice warm bath (with bath bombs, of course) and put on a deep conditioning treatment on my hair that my mom gave me. I put on comfy clothes, watched Netflix, and made myself a meal. I drank tea and tried to fight the sad feelings I was having. It's not much, but it's a start.

This blog will be a way for me to stay accountable, but it has a second purpose, as well. I'm a writer. And while I spend my days writing advertorial copy and blogs for clients, this has made me less interested in writing for myself. This blog might help with that. It's a way for me to put my thoughts and feelings down in writing. I'm much better on paper.

There are so many things I cannot control in my life, but I can control how I present it. I'm sure that some days I'm just going to want to throw in the towel, but I think I've got to try.

Don't worry, I won't post on this daily. Who has the time for that? But I will try to check in whenever something strikes me as noteworthy.

Happy New Year!